Immigration Humor

Let's keep this one going...

An Englishman, Frenchman, Mexican, and Texan were flying across country on a small plane when the pilot comes on the loud speaker and says,  "We're having mechanical problems and the only way we can make it to the next airport is for 3 of you to open the door and jump, at least one of you can survive." The four open the door and look out below. The Englishman takes a deep breath and hollers "God Save The Queen" and jumps. The Frenchman gets really inspired and hollers "Viva La France" and he also jumps. This really pumps up the Texan so he hollers "Remember the Alamo" and he grabs the Mexican and throws him out of the plane.

Oh TS, you said a mouthful there. You know they do. Ok, you talked me into it..LOL:

Dear Abby,
 
I am a crack dealer in Columbus who has recently been diagnosed as a carrier of the HIV virus.
My parents live in a suburb of Worthington and one of my sisters, who lives in Dublin, is married to a transvestite.
My father and Mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling marijuana and are currently dependent on my other two sisters, who are prostitutes in Grove City.
I have two brothers. One is currently serving a non-parole life sentence in Lucasville for the murder of a teenage boy in 1994. The other brother is currently in jail awaiting trial on charges of sexual misconduct with his three children.
I have recently become engaged to marry a former Thai prostitute who lives in Atlanta and is still a part time "working girl" in a brothel.
All things considered, my main problem is this:
I love my fiancée and look forward to bringing her into the family and I certainly want to be totally honest with her, but...
...should I tell her about my cousin who is a University of Michigan fan? He's an Illegal from Mexico.
Signed,
Worried About My Reputation

If you guys want truth and laughter - click on the following link: http://www.khow.com/pages/boyles.html

This is a local radio talk show celebraties website, and on the left side of the screen scroll down a little ways and you will see the name Sen. Kennedy singing in Spanish  

   
Senior Kennedy appear to had a little to much.   He did this sometime late last week on an American/Mexican radio station out in California....listen to it all - including the end.

An Arab, a Mexican and a Texan walked into a bar.   They each ordered a mug of ice cold beer.

The Arab downed his, threw the glass mug into the air and shot it.  As it fell to pieces on the floor, he said, "There's so much sand to make glass  where I come from that we never have to drink from the same mug twice!"

The Mexican downed his beer, threw his mug in the air and shot it to bits.  "We have so much cheap labor where I come from that I never drink from the same mug twice!"

The Texan drank his beer, licked his lips, turned to the Mexican and shot him.  "Where I come from, we have so many illegals that I never have to drink with the same one twice!"